Crabby Blogging Lady

You asked for it, I got it. Crazy cars!!! It’s ALL the rage now, huh?

Roll out the barrel! Haha!

The Good: No more banging the car door against other cars in the parking lot! The Bad: If someone rear-ends you and you aren’t buckled in…..

This one is best followed by the “dog” car. What a design, though. Must have taken some heavy-duty technical expertise from the Houston web design gurus to get this one right….

*Some* people would accuse me of driving such a car…

Just plain weird.

Show-off:

Uhhhh what is it? The Blob?

I’ve always wanted to drive a Chia Pet. Hey, you could also snack on something green while in traffic.

This one must have a magnet for an engine. Hold on to your refrigerator magnets, people, lest this car slurp them up while it goes down the street!

The Barbie car. Or, Maureen Dowd car.

This one helps alleviate the “bugs splattering on the windshield” problem.

A popular model for Third World countries.

Tacky!!

I hope you enjoyed these as much as I did. :D What’s your favorite?

I am SO SO tempted to do this! Bwahahhaha!!! But if I do, my cat will move out of the house and never speak to me again…

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These just never grow old. LOL. Ever since I saw the first viral Fashion Roadkill (bwahahahah!) of a poor model tripping over her prom dress and high heels, FAIL photos are too funny. What you think, huh? ;) Here are some good ones:

Oh dear! I think this may have been at my local Walgreens??? Whoopsie!

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I had no idea Jesse’s brains were Strawberry Slushy! Wait a minute… musta happened after Toy Story 2… Yum, eat up, kids!

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Something tells me the other car was to blame, am I right? Yeah…

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LOL.

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Looks like we’re outsourcing our cemetery circulars, now, too?

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WIN! Ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

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BWAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAH!!!!!

OK, I hope that’s funny to you. I thought it was hilarious. I, beloved reader, am a cat lover. I do not appreciate others who love cats… for dinner, that it. Cats are to be cuddled and loved and nuzzled and squished. NOT eaten.

Yes, yes, I am a budding crazy cat lady. I only have three cats so far… my husband won’t let me get anymore (yet, hehehe). I admit, having cats takes stamina. Cats are wonderful creatures, but there are some days you just want to throw them in the basement and turn the Kwikset until they adjust their ‘tudes, ykwim?

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But gosh, cats are cute.

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Heh heh heh.

A man, nearing his end of days on the earth, told his wife, “I’m determined to take my life savings with me when I die.” He instructed her to pack up all their money into a suitcase, which he promptly stuffed into a corner of the attic of his house.

He gleefully told her, “This is what I’m going to do– after I die, I’m going to grab the suitcase on the way up. I’ll take it all with me and be rich in the afterlife!”

So the day came, and the man died. His wife hesitated for a few days, but she could bear the suspense no longer. She timidly walked up the stairs to the attic, only to find the suitcase with money still sitting in the corner, untouched.

She pondered for a moment, then exclaimed, “Oh dear! I suppose we should have put the money in the basement.”

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A newly deceased man approached the Pearly Gates, carrying a heavy sack. He walked up to St. Peter at the gate. Peter spotted the bag, and stopped the man from continuing through the gates.

“Sir, I’m sorry; you can’t take anything with you beyond this gate.”

The man stopped in shock. He looked at St. Peter and said, “I’ve worked my entire life for what’s in this bag! I refuse to leave it behind!”

St. Peter repeated his statement, “Sir, I’m sorry, but you cannot take this with you. That’s our policy.”

The man was adamant. “I’m not going in unless I can take it with me!”

Peter’s curiosity was slightly aroused. “Sir, what is in that bag that is so precious?”

The man, beaming with joy, opened up the bag and hefted out a very large, shiny gold brick. He held it up for Peter to admire.

Peter stared. “Pavement?!?”