Crabby Blogging Lady

I got another award! I’m still in shock.This is, what, my fourth, fifth award?? This time it comes from Staci of Just Bloggled, and it’s the Queen of All Things Aww-Summm award. Wow. I’m flabbergasted.

All these awards are starting to make me wonder about something:

1.) Either I am not crabby enough,
2.) People just love crabby ladies, especially blogging crabby ladies, OR
3.) People are comprehensively consumed by my artful brilliance and eloquence and they can’t HELP themselves in their adoration.

I’m inclined to think it’s #3. (If only I could get them to send cash!) Maybe with a smidgen of #2. I don’t think it can be #1, because I still get a good share of nasty emails and comments. So I don’t think I can ramp up the crabbiness without threatening my U.S. citizenship or something.

I do believe I have discovered the perfect balance of crabbiness!

Many thanks, Staci! I will cherish this award with all my dark little heart. So now for the “rules.” Hm, apparently this is a consitutional monarchy as there is some form of Magna Carta I must adhere to. Bah, I can always banish the precepts like the progressives do… Are these rules “living” and “breeeeething” by any chance? Heh heh.

List seven things that make you awe-summm.
Pass the award on to seven bloggers you love.
Tag those bloggers to let them know that they are now Queens of All Things Awe-Summm.
Don’t forget to link to the queen that tagged you.
If you would like, copy the pic and put it on your sidebar so everyone knows that you’re a queen.

So…. 7 things Aww-Summm, huh?

• 1. Up until I turned a frail and fragile 42, I was able to arm-wrestle (and WIN) anyone who dared try me. I especially loved embarrassing the teenaged boys, who were so snooty in their arrogance and condescension. Haha! My secret? Don’t try to wrestle the opponent’s arm– maintain your position and allow him to huff and puff until he’s exhausted. Then, WHAM! Ya GOT HIM! Oooo just thinking of it makes me want to go stake out another teenaged victim, heh heh!
• 2. I am a FIRM believer in “Children should be seen and not heard” at the dinner table. Adult visitors LOOOVE me.
• 3. I’m a Christian– born-again, baptized, Holy Ghost-filled, radical Christian. I’ve studied philosophy, law, and history, and am completely convinced in the Christian religion– it’s truth and it’s purpose. Thanks to this, I am no longer the wallflowerish, insipid, unhappy, shrinking violet that I was as a youth. There’s something wonderful about not only being bold and outspoken, but being assured of the facts in doing so.
• 4. I love Disco and Funk. If that doesn’t prove beyond any doubt that I am the Queen of Aww-Summm, then I don’t know what is.
• 5. I used to have my own radio show, at a small radio station in New York State. One of the most popular segments of my show was “In Case You’re Stopped and Questioned on the Street.” It was usually a statement or brief story of meaningless but educational trivia, such as, “Did you know that a group of geese is called a ‘flock’ when it’s in flight, but the group on the ground is called a ‘gaggle.’ ” For some unexplicable reason, people loved meaningless trivia in short bursts. I suppose this was an early precursor to blogging, eh?
• 6. I never owned a Barbie doll until one was given to me at age 14. And it was too late– for by then, I had already formed the realization that my life has a purpose beyond being eye-candy for men. :-p
• 7. Not only am I the Queen of Aww-Summm, I am a queen of organization. I have file cabinets with receipts in chronological order; my desk is one huge organized bookcase with everything in its place; all my kids’ homeschool stuff is in racks organized by age– each kid has their own rack of notebooks, papers, etc; I have all my nails and screws organized by type in little plastic drawers; I am a fiend when it comes to the household members picking up after themselves. I AM DA QUEEN!!!!

*pant pant*

I am exhausted after all that bragging! Please don’t make me do it anymore!

And so… now I get to pass this along. Well, of course, no one is obligated to do this. And being the QUEEN, I don’t feel that I am obligated to pass it on. I’ll leave this as an open invitation– feel free to participate (men allowed) and come back and leave your link here, so I may run to see your reasons as to why you are so aww-summm.

Thank you, royal subject, for reading this far. And now if you will excuse me, I am spotting a young blonde and a white hare trotting across my chess board, and must go whack them on their heads with my scepter. Bye bye.

UNBELIEVABLE.

People, I don’t know what’s happening in this world. I just don’t know.

I received word last week that someone else likes me! I now have FIVE whole friends! What am I going to do?! I am thoroughly unprepared for the barrage of well-wishin’ and card-exchangin’ and nicey-nicey compliment-givin’ I have to do now. I guess that means I’l have to vacuum the area rugs, start laying out the doilies, and make little scones and herbal tea, for all the company I’ll soon be getting. Darn it.

Cactus Jack Splash– one of the finest horses I ever did virtually meet– has awarded me the Pasionate Blogger Award.

Crabby Blogging Lady– While she says she is crabby, it really is passion coming out.

It’s hard to believe that a horse has more sense than most people… but I guess it’s true. Thank you, CJS, for your friendly neighs my way. Won’t you be my “neigh”bor? HAHAHAHA! Just HAD to say that.

So.

Well.

I guess I have to reach out and pass it along.

Nah, I don’t have to if I don’t want to, do I? Can I keep it all myself? After all, now that I am no longer crabby, but passionate, my selfish desires and rants have a new angle! Yeehaw! I think I love you, you gorgeous gelding. Next time Mr. Crabby tells me to shut my complaining mouth, I’ll shoot back that I am passionate. That’ll learn him!

Someone gave me an award! For being crabby! Ray at Esoteric Journey awarded me the “Let’s Be Friends” award! Well, by golly, now I have THREE whole friends! What a treat! Thanks, Ray!

What’s more, here’s the description of the award:

These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.

So I’m charming! Hear that, Mr. Crabby! Ray called me charming! hah! Take that!

Well, so.

I’m about as flabbergasted about this as when my mother gave me industrial handles for my first wedding anniversary. Hm.

According to the award rules, I have to find eight people worthy of this honor.

Nothing’s happening here, folks.

Oh wait. I remember. There are some very lovely people who have commented here on my blog– bloggers I admire a great deal, actually. They have got GUTS to leave their remarks. I would like to honor these people and give a hearty “THANKS” for tolerating my crabbiness- even enjoying it from time to time. Your comments mean a lot to me, truly. I don’t have any party favors or consolation prizes for you– a virtual award will just have to do. :D

• Patricia of Subjective Soup, who is NEVER crabby, not even when she takes her mother to an appointment on the wrong day! Unbelievable! I’d be wearing the strait jacket after that.
• Kathy of Junk Drawer who is *almost* as absent-minded as I. (I got ya beat, lady)
• Shinade who has been to hell and back and is unbelievably CHEERFUL about it all! What a lady!
• Susan, who is miraculously able to do Thursday Thirteen. EVERY WEEK! I run out at three and then quit!
• Joe, who runs a weirdo Zucchini Award series at his blog every… what is it, every week? Gawd, I hate zucchini. I like Joe, though. Cool blog.
• The Hawg– I love the Hawg! He hates the government almost as much as me!
• Melissa, who had a good post about preventing cancer. You forgot to mention avoiding Aunt Vivian’s toxic fruitcake, though.
• Carole, for her Thoughts Too Short for a Blog Post posts. But the thing about Glenn Beck– let me give you a little advice, Carole: stock up on those potatoes, girl, you ARE going to need them.

Well, I did find eight worthy people. Very worthy people. Say, Ray– maybe you ought to just divvy up my award and hand it to these folks! How about a round of applause for these people! Thanks for visitng my blog and being my pal, as hard as that is.

I just love blogging. And I love others who blog! I’ve made some really cool pals with blogging. And I especially love it when they link to my blogs. I am honored to have received a huge amount of blogging awards. It’s not awards that really bless me, it’s the receiving of them. I am really happy that people like my blog!

But there’s one thing I have to crab about.

(of course!)

I don’t like doing the award posts.

I don’t mean to offend my pals (HONEST, I don’t!). I am so, so, so thrilled that you read my blog and make the effort to say you like it and link to me. And I love to link to people, too! But…. doing the awards is sometimes such a chore.

I have a creative hankering, and posting a photo of an award with 5-10 links is kinda… dull. You know what I really like? Those memes– those things where you answer questions with witty and creative stuff. Now, I like those, and that’s real content! So I wish instead of passing along images of little awards with a post full of links, we could get to know each other a little better and pass along quizzes or questionaires.

‘Cuz those are cool.