Crabby Blogging Lady

I’m STILL sick as all get out. I haven’t been this sick in, what, 16 years! That was back when I had three young children (all under the age of three– yeah, it’s no wonder I’m so crabby now, eh?) and we got the flu FOUR TIMES that year, all in a row.

I wish people would keep their sicky sneezes and coughs AT HOME and not bring them to the grocery store and to work! Then, I wouldn’t be contaminated and become so sick!

If only I had a Sickness Geiger Counter or something. I could point it at people, their sickness index would display like some kind of Symbol LS2208, and I could avoid them. And never get sick!

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*sigh*

And to top it all off, I discovered that the virus my computer got was never killed! I scanned my blasted computer with every spyware killer in the book… but OpenDNS says there’s still some botnet trying to phone home. GAHHH!!! I don’t have the wits about me to reformat the computer again!!

So I’m spending all day in bed, changing all my passwords and etc. Oh, and my new (used) Mac computer is in the mail, too. Can’t wait til that comes in.

Gah I lost track of what number I’m on for my Pet Peeves posts.

PET PEEVES

• Losing track of your Pet Peeves Posts number!!!
• Comfy, cozy cotton shirts that shrink at the waist upwards after a few washes. What the?! I paid good money for these shirts– why can’t they switch around the warp and the woof and make them shrink from the SIDES?! I hate baring my navel– people stop me on the street and breathlessly ask, “Can I have your autograph, Britney?” It’s just SO annoying!
• Weathermen who get all excited about a “WINTER STORM” coming!!! LOOK OUT-TREACHEROUS ROAD CONDITIONS!!…. and then report we’ll be getting 3 to 4 inches of snow. THAT’s a storm?!
• Walmart. Just everything about Walmart.
• LOL Dogs. They just aren’t…. lol.
• Incessant ads for belly fat burners and blackhead removal. Hello?! Just quit eating and wash your face!
• Neck bones and giblets in roaster chickens and turkeys. Who uses necks and giblets anymore?! And it’s a painful and frustrating task, trying to dig out a half-frozen, spiny neck from the rear end of a chicken.
• [unintelligible] *mutter mutter*

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If you don’t think we’ve entered some kind of wacko police state, read this:

Girl, 6, Handcuffed, Committed Because Of Classroom Behavior

A Port St. Lucie first-grade student was handcuffed and committed to a mental health facility because of her classroom behavior, and her parents are furious that the school took such extreme measures.

…Deputies said his daughter, Haley, got upset and stormed out her classroom when her teacher asked her to do something. The report said it then escalated into a temper tantrum in the principal’s office.

According to the incident report, a deputy said Haley was out of control. It said she “kicked the wall, went over to the desk and threw the calculator, electric pencil sharpener, telephone, container of writing utensils and other objects across the desk.”

She was then handcuffed. …Even worse is what happened the next day, Haley’s parents said.

A deputy was called to the school again after Haley had another tantrum in the classroom and principal’s office.

The sheriff’s report said she was yelling, throwing things and hit the principal, who is eight months pregnant. This time, she wasn’t handcuffed. She was committed to a mental facility.

The kid had a TEMPER TANTRUM. Isn’t handcuffing the poor girl and shipping her off to an insane asylum a LITTLE too harsh?! What the heck is happening in this country? If they’re not dosing the kids with sleeping pills anti-tantrum meds, then they are sending them to mental looneybins!!

Anyone remember the story of Helen Keller? She was blind and deaf at 18 months, from a sickness. Her parents coddled her out of pity and spoiled the kid rotten. By the age of 6, she was a frustrated, raving, holy terror. Back then, a hundred years ago now, adults realized that young children needed GUIDANCE, needed DISCIPLINE. Not handcuffs, a not tasing, not mental health drugs. Thank God a devoted teacher (Annie Sullivan) with some backbone helped Helen.

I feel so sorry for kids today, because they live in such a selfish, violent society where, if they survive the saline solution from Planned Parenthood and Chester the ******* down the street, they are thrown in brick-sided dungeons where police patrol the halls. No one cares for them, no one understands.

…now they’re going to mechanize war! Just like in Star Wars– war robots!

TEL AVIV, Israel – Israel is developing an army of robotic fighting machines that offers a window onto the potential future of warfare.

Sixty years of near-constant war, a low tolerance for enduring casualties in conflict, and its high-tech industry have long made Israel one of the world’s leading innovators of military robotics.

…Over 40 countries have military-robotics programs today. The U.S. and much of the rest of the world is betting big on the role of aerial drones: Even Hezbollah, the Iranian-backed Shiite guerrilla force in Lebanon, flew four Iranian-made drones against Israel during the 2006 Lebanon War.

When the U.S. invaded Iraq in 2003, it had just a handful of drones. Today, U.S. forces have around 7,000 unmanned vehicles in the air and an additional 12,000 on the ground, used for tasks including reconnaissance, airstrikes and bomb disposal.

I have a better idea! Let’s just STOP THE WARS! How about everybody quits the land- and money-grubbing and is CONTENT with what they have?! How’s them apples?

War is bad enough. Now they want to make it even easier with automation. Rrrrright. Mangled bodies, broken homes and hearts, devastated lands, mesothelioma, and radiation poisoning– that’s not enough! We have to spread the death and destruction by making war EASIER! Yay!

If these dudes were really serious about making war more palatable, they’d toss out all their bombs, and play competitive chess or use Lego men to smash each other. Easy as that.

Now don’t take me for a pacifist here. I love my AK-47 just as much as any girl. But I’m not going to go use it on my neighbor because I covet his pea patch! And I’m also not going to create a robot army so I can with a clear conscience invade my evil neighbor! And what good is it if my robots shoot his robots? Won’t we both just build more and more and more robots? How is this supposed to solve anything?!

War is EVILLLLLL. It must come with a cost! Otherwise, destroying people and their lands will be as easy as flipping a switch.

Help! Help! No it’s not the problems figuring out my online backup syncs. It’s my printers— my computer printers are driving me into bankruptcy!!

PRINTER INK.

That’s all I have to say for the rest of the world to get their blood boiling! And according to Gizmodo, printer ink is even more costly than human blood!! Look at this stunning graph.

That, dear people, is insane. WHY oh WHY do printer manufacturers charge so much for their stupid ink! Not even the *slightly* less expensive refills are worth it! Plus, if you happen to accidentally spill it onto your skin, this is what happens:

GRRRRREAT. I have to go out to the store with this all over my hand. It JUST HAD to be magenta ink that got on my hand. It looks like blood! It won’t wash off, no matter how hard I try. And I can’t wear gloves while pinching tomatoes for ripeness, and fumbling with my nickels and dimes at the checkout, now can I?

I say we should revolt against this printer ink tyranny. We should refuse to buy anymore ink: not those $40 name-brand cartridges, nor those lousy drip ink refills! We should just throw away the PRINTER, and buy a new one. Did you know that you can buy a brand new printer with new cartridge included for LESS money than an ink cartridge refill?! Insane!! And every time the ink runs out of that new printer, THROW THAT AWAY and buy a new one again! Before long, the landfills will be filled with mountains and mountains of new printers! It will cause an outrage, and the backlash will be against the printer ink manufacturers (backlashes are always against the businesses in this country). So then the manufacturers will be FORCED to lower their prices to reduce this glut of printer-laden landfills! You know, SAVE THE EARTH and all that. Those SAVE THE EARTH people are pretty gullible, I’m sure we can convince them that expensive ink causes global warming, polar cap ice melts, and alien crop circles in cornfields.

So who’s with me????

Pet Peeves. We all have them. I just happen to have more of them than the average bear. It’s part of my crabby charm.

• Coming up with AMAZING ideas for blog posts while I’m in the shower. I have no way to write them all down! And by the time I’m done, I’ve completely forgotten all that greatness! GAH
Magazines with naked women on the covers, their bare arms hiding the tiny bits that the law won’t allow them to expose. I HATE this. Dear magazine editors and starlets: Maybe you think everyone wants to see your bare skin with you covering only the tiniest of strategic places… but no, I really don’t. Keep it under a paper bag, honey. And get a life.
• Those STUPID uneven floor tiles at the entrance/exits of WalMarts. When you wheel a grocery cart full of bags of groceries over the floor, everything in the cart bounces up and down a couple of feet. Not to mention that when I’m leaving WalMart, I want to get out of there in a hurry. But NOOO they make it so that your eggs crack and your celery splits apart from wheeling over those idiotic floor tiles! Not only that but you have go through a military-grade obstacle course, dodging the massive influx of people coming in the Exit doors. THUMBS DOWN for WalMart.
• Liberals, who, in losing an argument, resort to name-calling, character slander, or changing the subject, because they feel they must have the upper hand. Someone recently accused me of not being “intelligent” because I ‘dissed’ a stupid TV show, and Bertrand Russell, AND used CAPS TO PROVE MY POINT in the same blog post. Since he/she/it had no answer to my brilliant reasoning and deductions, he/she/it complained about my USE OF CAPS and said I couldn’t hold an intelligent conversation. Like, big whoop– like, that accusation was supposed to make me feel inferior?! See, the problem with atheists and liberals is that, to them, truth is irrelevant; what matters to them is if a point makes them FEEL superior or not. For me, truth and the pursuit thereof is EVERYTHING, and how I feel is irrelevant. It is so difficult to have conversations or debates with liberals because of this. Not all are this way, but perhaps 98% of them are.
• By the way, thAT CAPs lock is preTTy dARn aNNOYing, too. I’m aLWaYs hitting it aCCIDentaLLY. gAH1111

So those are my pet peeves for the week. Huzzah. Until next time!

UPDATE: Just thought of another one!!

• Carefully crafting a post, hitting publish, then going back to see ALL these typos and mangled grammar! GAH!!! I hate that!